The Call!!!!

We got it!!!! We got the call. I was sitting in the cabin on top of Old Smoky. My cell phone rang. Now to get my phone to ring was a miracle since reception up there was sporadic at best. I answer and hear Mary's voice. At that point, I'm quite confused as I was not expecting her call. She says something like, "Whatever you are thinking, it's probably right" Then the phone call drops. OMG. So I run out of the cabin to the top of the hill and try to return her call. It's UNKNOWN. So I cannot call her back. I try to call Randy. He doesn't answer. (He and Judson were hiking with my cousin at the time) So I start pacing. Then Mary calls back. She tells me about our little guy. He's 12 months old and is pretty healthy. (he's currently being treated for gastroenteritis) He's 28 inches tall and 20 pounds.

We have some VERY CUTE pictures to share. However, the rules prevent me from posting them until we are legally declared his parents. BUT, if you happen to wander by our house or run into us, ask to see the pictures. We'll be happy to share.

More details as they become available. Now we keep our fingers crossed that we can make it through the courts before they close for rainy season. Not sure that will happen though. It's taking on average about 8 weeks to get a court date and based on the FBI list, only about 50 % of the cases make it through the first time. So, keep us in your thoughts that all will go well and our little guy can come home soon.

Sun and Fun

Yippee. We're heading out for some much anticipated family vacation time. No phone (thanks T-Mobile for not working in our mountain get-away) and no computers. So for all those stalking our blog, we're on hiatus starting Sunday. Nothing to see here!

Best of luck to all of those families who have court dates next week. Here's hoping for a 100% sweep. For those at the top of the FBI list, I'm keeping my fingers crossed that you get The Call while we are away. And for those like us who are not quite at the point of getting The Call, here's to keeping our hopes high and our patience even higher.

For Grace and Meredith, here's hoping you move to the next level of delirium while I"m gone. The "I got THE CALL and now I want my COURT DATE" phase of delirium!

Blah, Blah, Blah

Two months and Two weeks. That's where we are. Not quite in "THE WINDOW". So, we can't really get excited. It's very BLAH. It's the point where your head says, 'You will get a referral soon' (relatively speaking) but your heart still has doubts. So we wait.

No real movement on the F.B.I. list either.

Blah, Blah, Blah

Grief and Loss

One of the things we are doing while waiting is fulfilling our education requirements. The last video I watched was on Grief and Loss. It talked about the many stages of grief we go through when we lose something or someone so close to us. (sadness, anger, denial, etc) I couldn't help but to think back to when we received Ansley's referral. (That was about 2.5 years ago) The thing that struck me most was her eyes. In my whole life, I do not believe I have ever seen so much sadness in such a tiny child. It broke my heart to look into those eyes. It was a sadness that went down deep into her soul. Then we brought her home. I saw less of the sadness and more of the anger. Her eyes shielded her soul. There was a wall that would not allow sadness to enter. There was a VERY angry and confused little girl. She would bite her siblings. (Probably more because of frustration at the language barrier) She would scream very loudly. She would kick and strike out at you if you picked her up. (not always, but significantly more than my other 2 children) I remember walking into the bedroom where she and my son had been playing. Apparently, she had bitten him one too many times. He was hitting her HARD. He was very angry with her. What broke my heart was the look in her eyes. She just glared at him. She was not crying (and I know he was hitting her hard enough to hurt her). She had a look of defiance. It was a look of "if you think that hurts, you don't know what pain really is. You can NEVER hurt me." Finally, we had a break through moment. One night when Randy had picked up Ansley, she went into her screaming rage. She was kicking and hitting him with little balled up fists. I kept telling him, "Don't put her down" She did this for what seemed like an eternity. The whole time, Randy kept holding her. Finally, I walked over. I sandwiched her between me and Randy just as tight as I could. She went limp. She was totally spent, not an ounce of energy left. She fell asleep and he held her. I think that was the first of many turning points for her and us.

So, I've seen the sadness and I've seen the anger. Are we through with sadness and anger? Probably not. I'm sure as she gains more understanding, we'll revisit these feelings. I'm sure we'll hit upon denial also. It makes me sad that she had to go through what she went through. It also makes me happy that she is My Little Girl. As with all my children, I wish I could shield her from those feelings. I cannot. All I can tell you is she is a happy child most of the time, now. She does have those hormonal, teenage moments which scare me, as she is only 3. She has a survival mentality that helps most times but sometimes gets in the way.

Here she is talking about her 'family'


And this is why we are doing it again. She is such a blessing to our family. We are so lucky to have her in our family and look forward to #4 joining us.

Eating Out (x-post)

We went to my new favorite restaurant last night, Meskerem. Who'd of thunk my family would be loving Ethiopian food? I mean, if you know my kids, you know what a picky crew they are. If we go to our favorite Chinese restaurant, Ansley eats steamed rice and that is it. The boys eat nothing. If we go eat at our favorite Mexican restaurant, they will eat chips and Ansley eats the tortillas. If the restaurant doesn't have french fries, my crew won't usually eat. So what's up with this restaurant? I don't know but if anyone has a recipe of injera (that doesn't take 5 pounds of teff flour and 3 days to make), send it my way please. I think it has to do with the novelty of the injera AND the pleasure of not having to use utensils!Sawyer ate his weight in yellow split peas. Ansley concentrated on the injera. (which is best described as a sour dough crepe) AND Judson (the pickiest eater this side of the Mississippi) tried Lettuce, Tomatoes, Green Beans and Carrots. Oh yes he did! I was almost giddy when Judson started trying the food. He didn't consume a lot but he tried it all and said he liked it.Now Momma, she likes the veggie platter, with collard greens, split peas, cabbage, green beans. While Daddy, he likes the zil zil tibs. Oh yeah, we loved it! Who knows, I may get brave enough to take them to the vegetarian Indian restaurant just down the street. Gotta love living in a metropolitan area with such diversity!

Another Week Over

It was a great week for our agency families. Many, many received their referrals. In fact, almost all of the families who went on the wait list in January, rec'd a referral. (let me clarify, this would be those on the F.B.I. list. I don't have access to ALL the families waiting for referrals) That's exciting. We were all on pins and needles each day to see if anyone else received a referral. Of course, the last 2 days were anti-climatic because no referrals were given.

What does that mean for us? Hard to predict. If I were a betting person, I'd bet that we don't receive our referral until June. Not bad. That would still put us traveling in November/December.

So here's to an exciting week. Looking forward to a busy weekend.

Pic

For those who do not follow our family blog, I thought I'd post a picture of our children. This was at Christmas. We are excited about adding #4. By the way, that is what we are calling him, "#4". We have several names but just can't seem to decide upon one. We are desperately hoping that when we see his picture, we'll have an epiphany and we'll just know what his name should be. Going through life as "4 of 4" just doesn't seem right.

NOthing to REport

Coming up on 2 months waiting. Feeling good about it. Right after we went on the waiting list, there were 2 referrals on the F.B.I. list that got us excited. Both were for 14 month old boys. HELLO... One family rec'd their referral for a 14 month old boy after about on 6 weeks on the wait list. That family also got a quick court date and passed on the 1st time. THe other family is STILL waiting on a court date. Just to give you perspective, yet another family (Referred a boy of about 5 months old) is on their 5th court date. This is NOT an exact science. There is really no predicting. That said, the F.B.I. list is slowly moving along. There are still 4 families ahead of us with similar requests as ours. Two requesting boy/either gender 1-3 years old and 2 requesting boys, 0-18 months/12-20 months.

So we wait. The chances are SLIM (almost non-existent) that we'd get a referral and court date before the courts close. What does that mean? It means, when the courts open in October, they will try to get through all the back log of cases that were not completed before they closed. (Last year, that took about 4-6 weeks) THEN , they look on new cases. That means most likely, our case wouldn't be heard until November, possibly even December. Which also means, travel wouldn't be til December (if we're extremely lucky). THere is a bright spot, possibly. The Ethiopian in-country representative said dossier documents are good for 2 years in Ethiopia. That could be great, since our documents reach the 1 year mark in late October/early November. We are waiting to see if our agency will make us re-do any paperwork at that point. They are checking to see what the Hague requirements are.

We started our journey in October 2007. We hope to complete this leg of the journey in November 2008. (fingers crossed) For those familiar with the international adoption world, that a quick adoption these days.